By Bollywood has a long history of simplifying cultures into clichés. From exaggerated accents to stereotypical props, films often reduce entire communities to jokes. The latest example is “Param Sundari,” where a rich Malayali culture is condensed into three minutes of song, coconut jokes, and jasmine hair garlands.
But stereotypes aren’t limited to movies—they often spill into real life, especially in dating and relationships.
Bollywood’s Exotic Lens
In Param Sundari, the heroine is named Thekkapetta Sundari Damodaran Pillai, intended to sound exotic to non-Malayali audiences. The visuals follow familiar Bollywood patterns: women dancing Mohiniyattam, backwaters with parked houseboats, and endless cultural ornaments.
While the lead role went to Janhvi Kapoor, a talented actress, her accent didn’t resonate with Malayali audiences. This raises a common question: why are Malayali actors often overlooked unless they play side roles or villains?
Stereotypes in Real-Life Dating
Stereotypes extend beyond cinema. For Malayali men dating in North India, assumptions about culture, food, and attire are common:
Food Stereotypes
- “Do you eat rice three times a day?”
- “So, you don’t eat naan at all?”
Rice is a staple for Malayalis, and dishes like appam and stew are normal, but North Indian partners often perceive them as unusual.
Dress and Mundu Expectations
- Jeans can feel like a betrayal of tradition.
- Wearing a mundu at a party may be mistaken for cosplay rather than formalwear.
Language and Coconut Jokes
- Requests to speak Malayalam can feel like a novelty act.
- Coconut is often joked about: “Do you put coconut in everything?”
These cultural assumptions, while often lighthearted, reduce individuals to simplified caricatures.
Geography and Politics Misunderstood
Even geography and politics are simplified in conversations:
- “Kochi is in Tamil Nadu, right?”
- “Do all Malayalis argue about communism?”
Such misconceptions highlight how outsiders perceive Malayalis through a narrow lens shaped by media and stereotypes.
The Real Issue: Reductive Perceptions
Stereotypes are not just funny—they’re limiting. They erase individuality. In cinema, Malayalis may become “props” for jokes. In dating, men may be labeled as “Coconut Guy” or “Mundu Guy”.
The truth is, people fall in love with unique, personal quirks—not cultural shorthand:
- How someone fights for the last piece of appam
- Passion for traditional desserts like payasam
- Shared laughter over inside jokes
Breaking the Lazy Script
Bollywood will likely continue to oversimplify cultures, but real-life relationships can resist this. Instead of relying on assumptions, dating should celebrate authenticity, individuality, and cultural richness.
By moving beyond stereotypes, we allow relationships to flourish on genuine connection rather than cultural shorthand.
